Who needs to go to the gym?

[cowman]

My son rounded me up to help him give a cow a shot for footrot. I suggested we try to get her up to the squeeze but he thought we should just cowboy her out in the brush as she was about a half mile from home. Says she's real lame and won't be much of a problem!
Well we locate her and he ropes her. She suddenly decides she's not all that lame and drags us around through the brush for awhile until we get her snaked around a willow tree. Now she's a fairly stout cow and not all that impressed with us!
My son gets out the syringe and loads it up. I give him a big lecture about meat quality, neck injection vs. rear injection etc. when he approaches her hind end to give the shot! He says how in the hell can I give her a shot in the neck when she's six feet from the tree? Don't worry I say I'll hold her by the head as I know she's such a quiet cow...raised her myself you see!
Well she must have jumped on me half a dozen times after knocking me down but we got her snubbed up a little tighter anyway! I guess my son must have forgot all about the proper vet practices because he slammed those twenty ccs right in her butt! She promptly let loose with about a gallon of green manure that caught him right in the chest! His shirt was partly unbuttoned and it went right in! It sure was funny although he couldn't see the humor in it! I don't know why because he thought it was pretty funny when she was doing the funky chicken on top of me!
Anyway we both went home feeling quite refreshed from our little workout!

[ValueChainFX]

Thanks for the chuckle, we have all had those little experiences and that is why we only do one show a day!

I guess those are the things we need to help us smile. When they happen, we just have to wonder what the poor city folks are doing to smile these days?

[carebear300]

I shouldn't even admit to this little tidbit but since everybody has to have a giggle now and then here goes. The other day after the rain we hadn't checked the cattle up in the pasture in the hills for two weeks since we were busy harvesting we decided to go up and check them. Of course there was a stray Charlois bull in with our angus so proceeded to spend two hours chasing it out of the pasture back to where it was supposed to be. So we get back home and my brother and I proceed to change oil in the combine, well we are in a hurry and drain the oil out and take off the old filter and install the new filter. Then I count out my litres of oil and haul them all up about what seems like about a hundred feet to start putting it in. Well I get about half done and my brother lets out a yell(profane to say the least) about my lack of intelligence. I had forgot to put in the bung in the oil drain and half of the new oil was running all over the place. Should have cried over all the expensive oil that I had wasted and the mess I had to clean up but just burst out laughing. Then of course my brother really lost it but finally he had to laugh too. So much for getting in too much of a hurry. Got to start taking time to smell the roses!!!!! Life is way to short.

[Muttley]

Well if we are going to tell stories I guess I can tell one to!!

It was 3-4 years ago in late fall just after the first snow. I figured I had better head down to my valley pasture and feed the daily grain to my herd bulls. I had been feeding them just a little by the gate so when it did come winter they would be easy to bring home.

Well I looked and looked for those damn bulls everywhere, drove the pasture and all roads around three sides. I finally decided to check out some side hills and ravines. Well the only way to go is in my neighbors stubble field that borders up to the pasture. I had now been looking for about two hours, and it was starting to snow again.
As I was driving along looking off to the west in hopes of seeing a black bull in a white pasture I looked ahead of me just late enough to drive over a hill and swiftly rocket myself down about 20 feet on top of a rock pile. If that wasn't bad enough I climbed out uttering words that would make a sailor blush with shame, I slammed the truck door over and over figuring that should get me out. I finally slipped in the snow whacked my knee (on the again open door) that I discovered had a tree branch in it.

That all said and done I looked up wondering how the "H" am I going to get out of here and saw that all my bulls were looking over the fence at me wondering what all the ruckess was about.

P.S.- The insurance company that it was real funny to!!!

[cswilson]

WEll i won't relate all mine but my daughter used them in her 4h speech and won prov. public speaking-cows have a way of teaching humility.

[kato]

Many years ago we had a new cow, a little cranky, too, who had a calf one very cold January morning. We had a big heater box in the back of the shed, and both went in the pen to put the calf in the box.

That went OK, until we decided to leave the box, and go to the house. No...not going to happen. Looked out, and there she was, 3 feet away, shaking her head. We had to wait her out.

We were in that box for an hour. Good thing it had the heater!

[kato]

Many years ago we had a new cow, a little cranky, too, who had a calf one very cold January morning. We had a big heater box in the back of the shed, and both went in the pen to put the calf in the box.

That went OK, until we decided to leave the box, and go to the house. No...not going to happen. Looked out, and there she was, 3 feet away, shaking her head. We had to wait her out.

We were in that box for an hour. Good thing it had the heater!

[cowman]

Here's another one that has given me many a chuckle.
One day I was laying the wisdom on my son about how you go the extra mile for a client if you know he is in a position to put some serious money in your pocket. It was in reference to a very picky engineer in our oil service business but could be applied to any business. He had sort of had a little blow out with this guy.
Anyway I'm reading my son the riot act and said " What in the hell did you learn in four years at University taking business"
He replied "Well I learned how to drink beer and screw girls!"
I couldn't help it I just started laughing and said "Well I guess that's important too! At least it wasn't a complete waste of money!"

[ALICIA]

I thought you were just on a little trip to see St. Peter's. I know now way you didn't make it.

[cowman]

Never a doubt Alicia, never a doubt.