divorce help

[chaser]

Looking for help, Was married in 1997 she left me in 2004. Did not know about legal sep. Now going through divorce. they want what was accumulated from1997 to now. She did not farm she had a fulltime job. we run a family farm parents still farm. What are they really allowed? Is ther a silver lining somwhere? All help appreciated i live in alberta

[Ron]

find a really good lawyer, then get another and compare. you are screwed its just a matter of how hard.
dont waste money on a local lawyer, get one you cant afford and it might save you money. Are there kids involved? If so remember that they are more important than either of you.

Good Luck (after I talked to my big $$$ lawyer I decided it would be better to try again)

[AG_guy]

Alot of friends went through this and what the womens lawyer wanted was unreal. Think about what you stand to loose, now think is a good lawyer worth it to you ? And i agree talk to a few , they always said lawyers will give you a 20 min consult for free.

And if you heard of a great lawyer but they don't deal in divorce ask if he can refere you to a good one. Don't be afraid of playing hard ball either, In the end you may have to to make things fair.

Good luck

[barbiek]

Get help from an Ag lawyer as well. A friend got screwed over b/c his own lawyer didn't understand farming and how our income or lack there of works.

Try and negotiate as much as possible without lawyers and be reasonable. Is grandma's old cupboard worth starting a fight that could cause you to loose half of your assets?

A friend of mine got married and realized 6 months later it was a mistake. As a wedding present, her inlaws had given them 100 acres and were in a panic that they had now lost part of their farm. She had no intention of taking her share of that land because she knew it was part of his family's farm. Since she already made far more money than he did, the money wasn't really an issue either.

Good luck.

[coppertop]

Hopefully the family farm still has the
parents on the title, then things might
not be as bad regarding a settlement.
Most lawyers will be glad to drag on the
process until both parties have expended
most of their assets !!!
In some instances a mediator can be of
help to work out a property settlement.
Spousal support is another fly in the
ointment and it is pretty well cut and
dried unless both partners worked and
made an equal income.
Kids are the most important issue, if
there are any involved, they should
never be a party to any discord, or
disparaging remarks about either parent.
Their lives are already upside down in a
divorce, no point in having a tug of war
with them.

[Hopperbin]

I had some lawyer advice lately as a common law relationship over 6 years even need a legal separation or she can come back at any time and demand wealth created up to current date. In common law she is entitled to half the increased business assets, minus the first 2 years of being together. And half the house assets, so would suck if you did a lot of work to the house after she left. I would try to slap a loan on the house, and I have heard of writing another separate agreement say if you bought your farm from your parents you could easily create another agreement to pay interest say after principal is paid. Have heard of it working and interest payments can add quite a bit of debt. And do not have to really be paid but the agreement would be nice to show in court. Also If I were you go to several lawyers and and pay for advice if have to, myself I would have the lawyer assist me to represent myself in the courtroom if you ever get there. Remember each of your lawyers could very easily milk you for everything if you give them full control. Don't pay them in advance.

[coppertop]

I think this all points to the benefit of a
pre-nup agreement whether living common law
or marriage minded !!!

[chaser]

Thanks for all the help. Its just a screwed up system all the way around , lawyers now how to use you. hard to find lawyer who understands agriculture and how a family fam works. When she left me in 04 i thought that was it but no anything thatincrease value gets split less debt. What land was in 04 and what it is now increased gets split. Even if you bought machanary it gets split less debt. its a bad deal you try to get ahead and they can walk out smiling. not agaist splitting if they helped make the farm a better place. they always say live and learn really pay attention when it hits pocket book. thanks again